Why I'm a terrible photographer

So, as I just wrote to someone on Facebook, I have issues with taking pictures. Being an artistic person, I actually do like to take pictures-- but the catch is that there can't be any people around. So most of my pictures are of random objects in isolated places, or of myself with random objects in isolated places. It does get kind of old, especially since I think the most interesting pictures involve people. But whenever I decide to take a picture of anything anywhere where there are lots of people milling around, my inner monologue goes something like this:

"Okay, I'm going to slip my camera out of its case, and turn it on inside my bag so I can whip it out at a moment's notice. Okay, there's no one in the way so maybe I can take it now... Oh, wait! That guy is looking at me. I'm not a weird tourist taking pictures of this perfectly normal sign, mister, really I'm not. See, I'm just standing here spacing out like a perfectly normal person... Okay good, he looked away. Better get this done quickly. A quick look around again to make sure no one's watching, spot the target, and, bam! Okay, it's done. I hope no one saw that..."

Then of course when I go home to look at the picture more closely, it's all blurry or off-center because I didn't take the time to focus it. They say that with a digital camera, you're supposed to just snap a ton of pictures in succession so you have a better chance of getting some good ones... But I only take one (or maybe two if I'm really brave), and they usually turn out sucky.

Thus, most of my pictures from Thailand are... Well, sucky. And that's only because I forced myself to take a few. I have practically no pictures (that I took myself, anyway) from all this time I've been here in Japan. For some reason I just hate the idea of looking like a tourist or a "weird foreigner" (even though I really am a weird foreigner, even though being a weird foreigner is actually not a crime, and even though it really doesn't matter what random people think, anyway).

I think I need to fix this problem. Because it sucks not having pictures to share with people, and to look back at and remember things later.

Unfortunately, my camera (which I'd hardly used at all anyway) broke halfway through my trip in Thailand, and I'm not about to go out and buy a new one unless I'm sure I'm going to use it. I do have my cell phone though, which takes not-such-good-quality little pictures like this:


(This one is from Thailand, at some ancient temple ruins. It was windy. And there were no people within eye-shot when I took this.)

The great thing about a cell phone (for me anyway) is that it's not as obvious as a camera-- people can't always tell you're taking a picture with it. So maybe if I try taking lots of pictures with my cell phone, it'll help me get used to the idea?

I think I'm going to try it. We'll see how well I'll follow through with this, though.